Lie back and think of science...

[sawyl]

Here's Mary Roach, in an excerpt from her book, Bonk, describing the process of having sex whilst being ultra-sounded by Jing Deng, a medical physicist from UCL:

"Regarding the position..." he says when we return in our hospital gowns. He wants us on our sides, spoons-style. "I think facing the wall is better," Deng says. As opposed to facing him. "That will be more romantic," he adds. On the wall, someone has hung a painting of a hillside harbour town. As though by looking at it we could convince ourselves that we were on the Amalfi Coast - or, just as good, that Deng was. "And I will switch off the lights."

"Where are the candles and soft music?" Ed asks.

"Oh, I am sorry," Deng says, straight-faced, chagrined. Then he brightens. "I can turn on my laptop. I have the soundtrack to Les Mis." His efforts are sweet, though pointless. There is no way to make this situation romantic, normal, sexual.

Deng goes next door and returns with an envelope, which he hands to Ed. Inside is a copy of Maxim. "This is very erotic," he assures Ed. The implication being, I suppose, that the sight of one's wife in a baggy, knee-length hospital gown and threadbare socks is not.

Well, at least they eschewed the offer of Les Mis as more of a mood killer than a scientist with a probulator...